Romance & Finance – Why You Should Keep Your Money Separate

When most couples are in love, it’s only natural that they want to share any and everything with each other. If you’ve decided to cohabitate and/or get married, you may feel that the traditional thing to do is create a joint bank account and share expenses equally. And for some couples, that works out just fine. But sharing a checking account can have its drawbacks as well, and if you (or your partner) are not a fiscally responsible person, you might want to keep your finances separate in order to save your relationship.
For one, pooling all of your money in one place means you both will be withdrawing money for your personal needs as well as your joint needs, which can get tricky and messy really quickly. Suddenly, you’ll notice that he spends $20 a day on lunch, or he’ll soon discover that you spend a small fortune getting your hair and nails done. Now, if you keep a personal checking account and a joint account, then maybe this won’t be an issue. But if you both decide to keep ALL of your money in one account, expect there to be some possible resentment brewing if you both aren’t on the same page with your spending habits. Besides, if he buys you a gift, it’ll be like he’s buying you something with your own money. That’s not romantic at all.

Secondly, it may be hard to pinpoint who pays for what with a joint account. Now if one person is in charge of paying all the bills and all one partner has to do is deposit money into the joint account every month to cover his portion, then perhaps this can work. But if this isn’t the case and one or more bills go unpaid, it may be hard to determine who paid for what, when and with whose money. In my opinion, it’s just better to have one person in charge of paying the utilities while someone else is in charge of paying the rent/mortgage, etc. At least this way, if something doesn’t get paid, you’ll know who isn’t handling their business.
Third: I don’t know about you, but keeping track of my own checking account can be difficult if I’m not meticulous with my checkbook. Add to that keeping on top of a joint account in addition to your own and you might want to pull your hair out – especially if you have a partner who is just as or more lackadaisical than you are. If you each are responsible for taking sole ownership of your own accounts, arguments over money and spending habits will be kept to a minimum. People tend to care a little more when it’s their money, so they pay a bit more attention to their paychecks, how much money they’re spending and when bills are due when dealing with personal accounts. Keeping money separate makes it easier to manage; and if you have a partner with a different financial philosophy than you do, then you won’t have to worry about managing yourself AND him.
Lastly, what if you break up? I know no one likes to go into relationships thinking that they’ll end, but mama didn’t raise no fool either. There is nothing wrong with being in love and being practical at the same time. It’s easy to make a decision to share money when you’re all googly eyed over each other, but it’s harder to get out of a bad relationship if your money is still tied together. Too many times, people stay in dead relationships because they’re financially bound or dependent on the other person. Keeping your finances separate makes it easier to move on should the relationship go left. Many a couple have lived a happy, healthy life with their money in their own bank accounts, and if you want to be one of them then you might want to consider these potential pitfalls before you move forward with your lives together. And if you do decide to open a joint account, there’s nothing wrong with keeping your own account as well for your own expenses or splurges. Couples can still build a life and even wealth this way, so keep a little something for yourself so that you each can work and grow together while still maintaining a sense of self. Your relationship will thank you for it.